5 Golden Tips for New Parents

5 Saving Tips for New Parents Who Say "What Do I Do With This?"

Those who reminisce about the old days, please pass them on to new mothers.

In the first 3 months of motherhood, someone will come to you and upload some updates and information with an SD card. When you combine it with occasional sleeplessness, you may not be able to understand the areas of use of the information and what it is for. I have written 5 critical items that have become useful over time but I wish I had known this process from the very beginning.

But when you read some of the titles, you will understand that once you truly digest the information, it will have a positive impact on your entire life.

Let's get started, shall we?

Babies think they are in the womb for the first 3 months

Look, this sentence will protect you against every person who says, "You've gotten him used to being held too much." Internalize this idea tightly. He is your baby. He needs the lap, love, attention, but even more warmth and smell of his mother and father for the first 3 months. Give him time. It seems like 3 months will not pass, but it does. At the end of 3 months, when he starts to examine his surroundings, he will want you all the time. When he is 6 months old, too. Things will get a little more out of control between 9-12 months, and then you realize that while he is 1.5 years old and says, "Mom, get up. Go. Dad, you sit down," when he is 6 years old, he says, "You can't kiss me or hug me, this is my body."

Time really does pass quickly. To those who say "You've gotten this baby used to being held", I suggest you just say "Come talk to me and see if he's quiet?" :)

Those who do not help should not give advice either. My intelligence is enough for me and my child. Can those who speak take action, let them know about it? If they do not stay up at night and get up on our behalf every time the child cries, I think they should neither give advice nor say, "We all lived through it. How did you grow up?"

Babies see in black and white when they are first born

Babies' vision is something that develops over time. Therefore, at first, you can draw simple expressions (Smiling or Frowning Face) on white cards with a black pen and show them. You can talk to your baby a lot before he plays with toys. You can kiss and smell him a lot, rock him in your arms, sing songs and dance. He will have discovered the mobile hanging above his bed before he even realizes how time passes :) Until then, he will get by with lots of mom, dad, friends and family faces :)

Babies' Hands and Feet Act as Thermostats

When babies are first born, everyone is afraid that they will get cold and sick.

Not only for the baby, but also for the mother, wearing layers of socks, saying "wear a vest" in 40 degree weather, "your milk will get cold" (oh, I'm feeling hot again right now)

These fears always mislead people. After a while, when babies start to move, we either continue to not let them breathe because of our fears or we let them go, but this time they get sick because they are not used to it.

This is where this information comes in handy.

Newborn babies' hands and feet act as thermostats

So when the baby gets too hot, guess what happens

HANDS/FEET ARE ICE OLD.

At that moment, it actually means that you have dressed your child too much and your child is too hot.

If your baby's hands/feet are cold, do not put socks on top of socks or a sweater on top of a vest.

Lighten the layer on top a little, take off her hat, for example, massage the bottom of her feet a little, kiss and smell her, let her stinky feet get some air, and you too can take a deep breath, lean back on her and explain to the adults who are gossiping at home why her hands and feet are cold, sweetly(!)

Of course, don't let your baby walk barefoot in February or wear gloves for a while until you cut their nails, but don't be obsessive about it. Let your child learn to regulate their own body temperature. Don't disrupt your baby's innate abilities. The brain is a very detailed machine, who knows what will happen if you interfere with its work?

Babies Don't Get Sick from Cold Weather

One of my least favorite sentences is probably "Isn't this kid cold?"

Because actually in

"What kind of mother are you?"

"You should have at least taken the kid naked"

He also had the capacity to contain the sentences as sub-inner voices, "How can he wear such clothes? Look at him, he only dressed him in a thin shirt, a tank top and only a sweater and a coat. Where is this kid's two-layer wool tank top, a pair of booties and a pair of thin socks? Are they enough?"

At this point, you may want to say "Babies don't get sick from cold weather, they get sick from germs" and dismiss the subject, but they will never be convinced. You will accidentally go to the bathroom and the next thing you know, your child will be waiting for you like a gift package, wrapped in shawls, coats, blankets and even tablecloths if they are not already there, with a strong look of help.

My two daughters are winter babies. They were born in a technological hospital with a very good heating system. They will probably spend their entire lives in such environments. I don't know if we will ever see a house with a stove again, or if we will experience its adventures again at some point in our lives, but there is one thing that has been scientifically explained, and that is that people do not get sick from the cold (hypothermia is another topic). If it did happen, we would get sick from the moment we went from the living room to the bathroom while living in houses with stoves, we would not be able to live even a single healthy day of childhood.

People get sick from viruses that are active in cold weather and from a low immune system. No one can expect you to filter the germs in the air :) But if someone comes to your house with a runny nose and tries to kiss your baby and then tells you to "put some clothes on this", you can say "First try not to visit the baby while you are sick" :) Or anyone who is not sick themselves but has recently come into contact with a sick person is also included in this category.

The thing that is more dangerous than cold weather is the baby sweating. A sweating baby will inevitably be affected by the weather changes.

Therefore, we can choose not to make our baby sweat, for example.

It goes as the body gets used to it. Since we don't want Defne to get sick with every wind and breeze because the door is open, instead of dressing her, we dress her in whatever we wear, as seasonally appropriate as possible.

Therefore, over time, one of our favorite pieces of information became "You can't get sick from cold weather."

Protects breast milk

Breast milk does not protect against pregnancy, but it can protect against constant vomit-smelling t-shirts, swollen eyes from lack of sleep, postpartum buns, and not having time to leave the baby and take a shower :)

Yes, I saved the most important topic for last.

This was the CLEAR INFORMATION I heard the most after becoming a mother, but I couldn't make sense of it when it was used everywhere, whether necessary or unnecessarily.

It is very true that breast milk protects. Babies who breastfeed have a stronger immune system, and breast milk contains all the nutrients needed for the baby's development in abundance. Even if germs make your baby sick, you can overcome illnesses without needing any medication by breastfeeding frequently. It has a pain-relieving feature during teething periods, and your babies can relax by sucking. This is not the focus of this article, its benefits are endless. What we really need to know in connection with this information is as follows; you will hear suggestions such as milk protects against open wounds, eye discharge and many other things, and expressing and applying milk. Never apply any of these without getting approval from your doctor. The miracles of breast milk are endless, but milk is also something that produces bacteria very quickly. Don't start with a treatment purpose and end up worse.

There may also be those who will suggest this to you regarding your sexual life :) If there are those who say "Breast milk protects, don't worry, you won't get pregnant", what they are talking about is the prolactin hormone and yes, you won't get pregnant when it is at high levels in the body, but there is no such thing as 100%. The cleanest thing is to talk to your doctor about birth control methods at your first doctor's check-up as soon as your postpartum period is over and choose the one that suits you best.

BONUS: BABIES CRY

Why did I write this here, right?

After my first daughter was born, I realized that if we do not panic when she cries and can stay calm, especially during her colic periods, we can cope with her crying more easily.

But for example, when there are people around us and everyone is in a panic attack and they are looking at us

"Wow, you made the kid cry"

"The poor thing was taken aback"

When he says things like, "Give it to me, I'll shut him up. Oh, he's not quiet, take him, mother," we lose control.

At first, it was much worse, especially when my husband hadn't come home from work yet and I hadn't yet found the reason for the crying. Then I realized this.

I have a newborn baby in my arms. He can't speak, he can't see, he doesn't even know what's wrong with him at the moment. He just feels a problem and communicates.

This is exactly why "babies cry".

What should a child do when he is hungry, "Send me two lahmacun and tell me to come?" What do you mean?

"I'm cold blanket"

"I'm hot, open the window"

"My stomach hurts, gas massage"

"I'm sleepy, turn it on Bethoven, turn off those lights, they're hurting my eyes, clear out my bed, what's this, there's a zillion things in the bed, should I drown?"

"You wrapped me up like a cabbage, I'm overwhelmed again"

"What is this traffic? It's all stop and go, it's all stop and go, I'm bored. Mom, should you order the red fish again?"

So here comes the child crying for a million more feelings

It's not the end of the world.

I'm sure some people have raised their children without crying at all, but I wouldn't want my child to grow up quietly. He should make less noise, so we know he's there, look, that's why he's talking nonsense now, talking nonsense ????

Duygu Uzun; Mother of an 8-year-old boy with paws, 6-year-old and 3-month-old girls, and 2 fish... In her professional life, she is a human resources specialist, an adult education specialist, a gender equality activist, and in her amateur life, she is the writer of troubles, worries, and what she has learned while raising a human being...

Tags: parent, motherhood, birth, newborn